The Gates – Pilot – review

Welcome to The Gates, where everyone is painfully beautiful, friendly, and normal–until you realize that they’re not. 

Veteran homicide detective Nick Monohan moves his wife, Sarah, and their two children from Chicago to the charming community of the Gates, where he’ll be the new police chief.  The Gates itself is less gated neighborhood community than it is an extremely well gated and guarded community complete with schools, shopping centers, and obviously, a police force.  Also playing a big part in the pilot episode is the Radcliff family, who are neighbors to the Monohans.  Viewers are also introduced to a few of the townsfolk, such as the lady who runs the holistic clinic and her competitor, Devon, who runs a day spa, as well as several students aound school. 

As predicted, it turns out that nothing is what it seems in this idyllic community.  The Radcliffs are a vampire couple who have adopted a human girl.  The assumption is that their daughter, along with everyone else, is unaware of their other worldly connection.  These vampires can go out in Daylight, too, but as yet there are no rings or amulets to make that legit.  I didn’t notice any sparkling, either.  The two competing business women in town both turn out to be witches.  One of whom was the apprentice of the other, but has now turned pro.  The pack of students we meet turn out to be nothing more than  a pack of werewolves.  You know, the usual. 

Though the show as a whole is trite and lacks a unique hook to keep the viewer coming back, the story itself in this episode was enough to keep me interested for one episode.  The new chief shows up, and suddenly there is a missing persons report filed in a neighboring town for a contractor who was seen wrecking his truck in front of the Radcliff’s house.  Instantly Chief Monohan suspects something is amiss, but town and familiar pressure lead him to back down.  Of course, Mrs. Radcliff killed the contractor, much to her husband’s chagrin, as he points out that the only way they can live normal lives with a human daughter is within the Gates.  Mrs. Radcliff is struggling with temptation and cravings, so off to the witch she goes.  Meanwhile, Charlie Monohan is falling for the most popular girl in school, who happens to be dating a particlarly meat-headed werewolf with an anger management problem. 

I can only assume that ABC’s goal with this show was to create a supernatural Desperate Housewives to fill in summer Sunday nights. If that was, in fact, their goal, then they have succeeded.  This show isn’t much more than Wysteria Lane with fangs.  Unfortunately the fangs don’t make it that interesting, because ABC is a little late to that game.  This has all been done before, and recently, too, if you haven’t been paying attention to the news.  Based on the research I did, the show only has 2 episodes lined up thus far.  That says to me that ABC has little to no hope for this show, and that’s probably a safe bet.

Check out promo images for ‘Breach’, the third episode of The Gates, airing in July 11th!