Katy Perry to appear on the Simpsons

I just set down a hard copy of Thurston’s “Three-Dimensional Geometry and Topology: Volume I.” Listening to “BAM,” and the rest of “Sparks Fly,” by Miranda Cosgrove, and hoping that Jennette McCurdy, and her mother, and brothers, are doing well. And thinking Eureka. Not, I think, because I suddenly found it, but because I just recalled that Eureka Springs was the last place I heard Larry Boehmer was living. Dude had an MFA, and knew how to use it, unlike some people on the scene. I love going to The Zoo. Although they did boot me after I went on a rampage after almost drowning with Magic at the bar. Apparently they were not impressed with my claims to be Love, incarnate. Never are. But through the intervention of a friend, I was allowed to return after a spell, a long spell. Magic had huge hands, and made that guitar purr like a well tended cat. He would have made a swell puppet master for Katy Perry. I’d volunteer, but my wife doesn’t think I have room on my schedule to help Katy. So sorry, Katy.

Katy Perry tries so hard to get it right. Miranda did. Although you need special glasses, the kind I have, to see it. As Margo, in “Despicable Me,” she pops right off the plain, burning with desire, in at least certain scenes. So hot. Miranda Cosgrove’s “I love you” speech, as Margo, moved me. It is immortal. It surpasses the famous YouTube speech, by Shakespeare. You know the one. Where Hamlet begins, “Tube, or not Tube, that is the question..” Fred says, Yah, I say, neigh. Or the infamous precursor to all things Zach Galifianakis, from the movie “Deliverance,” where the Zach like character is encouraged to entertain the locals with his rendition of “The Three Little Pigs.” (I especially inserted it for you, Ariana Grande. Enjoy. Share it with Bon Jovi.) Perhaps this inspired Katy to carry on with Elmo. Although the information that Matt Groening and company allowed Elmo to be played in such an unseemly manner makes me wonder who is really pulling the strings at FOX. Unlike Alan Turing, I will not take a bite of the apple. As Katy knows, what really happened in The Garden, with that little ol‘ snake, is open to dispute. And all the literary folk, people of the book, know that. I know there is no need for a scapegoat, female or not.

So, Katy Perry has her response. It should suffice for Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez, and all the others. Taylor Swift tweeted “I love you,” right at me. But, my wife, thoughtful creature she is, sent me a note with zero punctuation. It reminded me that on the Billboard “21 under 21,” that although Taylor Swift is number one, she should be number zero, which would make Miranda Cosgrove number thirteen (13). Lucky Miranda Cosgrove, eh Taylor?

This comment has been made possible, in part, by the generous love and support of Ke$ha, or Ke$ha Rose Sebert, or “Bingo! I win!” as I sometimes like to call her.

Joy to you, Rose.