Mickey Rourke, Jeffrey Dean Morgan Action Flick THE COURIER Gets US Distribution

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Yet another film called The Courier is coming out. This one, an action flick, is getting distribution by Well Go USA Entertainment, according to The Hollywood Reporter. The distributor, known mainly for releasing Asian genre-fare Stateside, has begun acquiring more English-language films.

At first glance, this film didn’t do much to grab my attention.  It looked pretty derivative: courier must deliver mysterious briefcase to killer or his family will be murdered, and then have their skin harvested to make cursed luchador masks (only probably not that last bit).

But Jeffrey Dean Morgan, or, as he’s more commonly known, by his supervillain nom de guerre, “Bizarro Javier Bardem,” is one of those guys I’ve always loved, who never has good enough roles. Even the most mediocre of films (I’m looking at you, The Losers) is generally elevated by his presence. And who is Til Schweiger if not the “German Jeffrey Dean Morgan” (coincidentally, this is Schweiger’s supervillain name)? Sprinkle in some Mickey Rourke, and you have a bunch of guys who I love to watch in cheesy fare, preferably while drunk, eating pizza and yelling “Hollywood doesn’t understand you, but I do! I do…”

But, the biggest, weirdest, wildcard in the mix is Israeli director Hany Abu-Assad. For those reading the Complex who have no idea who he is, well… fair enough. But I remember a flick Abu-Assad directed called Paradise Now that I caught a few years back at the Melbourne International Film Festival, and I was pretty fucken impressed. The film followed two friends being recruited as suicide bombers. It was restrained, harrowing, and really, really gripping. The Courier, a bombastic, OTT action film, would be about a thousand kilometres away from the director’s earlier work, but this seems to be the unfortunate reality of getting established in the US, even if you’ve got an impressive resume behind you.

“Difficult, complicated and disturbing arty-dramas? Well, you’re in luck, my friend! We need someone to direct our new car-chase movie that Mickey Rourke has agreed to be in exchange for a car-boot filled with botox!” It reminds me of a guy I used to work with in a shitty menial job (before I got rich on the mad internet monies, dear readers) that told me he used to be a surgeon, but Australia didn’t recognise his Bosnian accreditations, and he didn’t have the money to study to get his Aussie qualifications. Yes, yes, I would say that having to direct a silly action film is definitely comparable to that.

Well, I’ll see the deeply sad injustice that is The Courier, and shed a pizza-grease tear for all the sexy-souls trapped in it. Even though it looks just cool and stupid enough that I might love it. I could only find a trailer in German, but the German language could not hide the fact that there’s a fight ON A ROLLERCOASTER IN AN ABANDONED AMUSEMENT PARK! Take that, art!

3 Comments

1. 

   Jimmy Callaway

   May 23, 2012 at 8:57 am

   Hey, I liked The Losers, buddy.

   Reply
2. 

   JayTomio

   May 23, 2012 at 8:59 am

   While not something I’d call great, I also was not offended by The Losers.

   Reply
3. 

   Liam José

   May 24, 2012 at 3:49 am

   Yeah, look, the Losers was fine, but I can’t say that I didn’t think it was pretty mediocre.
   I loved JDM in it, but it just didn’t do a bunch for me.
   I think I was probably expecting too much considering how much I loved the Diggle/Jock comics.

   Reply